LEAPING INTO SOMEBODY ELSE’S MIND. Ariely provides support for my favorite kind of gift giving—taking on “the great challenge… in making the leap into someone else’s mind.” He says that psychological research “affirms that we…have a hard time seeing the world from a different perspective” and adds: “…whether or not your sister likes the book [you choose], it may give her joy to think about you thinking of her.”
So Christmas gift giving, in the spirit of good will, encourages us to look at the points of view of our nearest and dearest.
Emerson, of whom I’ve read very little, caught my eye by writing that, if you would please a man and make him feel you’ve read his inner soul, you should treat him as if he were the exact opposite of how he appears. In the world of film (and gifts) there’s a movie called Captain’s Paradise, in which a man, played by Alec Guinness, has two wives–one is very domestic, the other very glamorous. One year, he mixes up his presents for them, and gives to the domestic one slinky black underwear, and to the glamorous one a frilly, flowered apron. Both of them are THRILLED. He’s finally seen the OTHER side of them. Of course, now his beautiful system is ruined, along with his life.